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	<title>Adam Vincent Gilmer - 8020365 Thinking</title>
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	<description>Applying The 80/20 Principle to Your Wheel of Life</description>
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		<title>Adam Vincent Gilmer - 8020365 Thinking</title>
		<link>http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com</link>
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		<title>How Will Better Time Management Benefit YOU?</title>
		<link>http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2011/08/10/adam-vincent-gilmer-explores-time-management-benefits/</link>
		<comments>http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2011/08/10/adam-vincent-gilmer-explores-time-management-benefits/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 10 Aug 2011 15:12:12 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Adam Vincent Gilmer</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Effective Time Management]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/?p=166</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[How will better time management benefit you?  Have you ever contemplated that question?  In this blog post, I encourage you to think about this question and to envision your life as though you have already mastered time management.  Below are &#8230; <a href="http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2011/08/10/adam-vincent-gilmer-explores-time-management-benefits/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a><img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com&amp;blog=4610217&amp;post=166&amp;subd=adamvincentgilmer&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>How will better time management benefit you?  Have you ever contemplated that question?  In this blog post, I encourage you to think about this question and to envision your life as though you have already mastered time management.  Below are a few questions that will help get you on the right path:</p>
<h3>When you manage your time effectively&#8230;</h3>
<ul>
<li>How do you feel?</li>
<li>What benefits materialize in your life?</li>
<li>Are you less stressed?</li>
<li>Do you get more work done?</li>
<li>Does your income increase or your debt decrease?</li>
<li>Do you spend more time with family/friends or partaking in a hobby?</li>
<li>Do you sleep better (because there is less on your mind)?</li>
</ul>
<h3>When you do Not manage your time effectively&#8230;</h3>
<ul>
<li>What happens (what is the payoff)?</li>
<li>Is the payoff positive?  Is there something else that suffers alongside the positive payoff?</li>
<li>Is the payoff negative?  What will it take for you to manage your time more effectively and therefore avoid the negative payoff?</li>
</ul>
<h3>are you ready for the benefits of better time management?</h3>
<ul>
<li>If you were able to more efficiently manage your time, what benefits would you expect to receive?</li>
<li>Are these benefits desirable to you?</li>
<li>What is your greatest fear about receiving these benefits?</li>
<li>What is the worst that could happen if you receive these benefits?  Can you survive the worst scenario you can think of?</li>
</ul>
<p>Hopefully asking yourself the above questions has helped you zero in on specific benefits you&#8217;ve experienced in the past when you did manage your time well.  I also hope you&#8217;ve uncovered your positive and negative payoffs for wasting time.  And lastly,  I hope that you have started to envision your life with all the benefits that can be manifested as a result of managing your work time and your personal time more wisely!</p>
<p>Cheers!<br />
<a href="http://www.adamvincentgilmer.com/" target="_blank">Adam Vincent Gilmer</a></p>
<p>Follow Me on Twitter <a href="http://twitter.com/#%21/8020365" target="_blank">Here</a><br />
Join My &#8220;8020365&#8243; Facebook Page <a href="https://www.facebook.com/pages/8020365/137678282942052" target="_blank">Here</a></p>
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			<media:title type="html">Adam Vincent</media:title>
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		<title>How To Identify YOUR Biggest Time Wasters</title>
		<link>http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2011/07/26/identify-your-time-wasting-activities/</link>
		<comments>http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2011/07/26/identify-your-time-wasting-activities/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 26 Jul 2011 14:35:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Adam Vincent Gilmer</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Effective Time Management]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/?p=155</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This post is the first in a series on developing better time management skills.  If you are like most people, you probably waste time on various tasks and for various reasons.  Determining what you waste time on and why you &#8230; <a href="http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2011/07/26/identify-your-time-wasting-activities/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a><img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com&amp;blog=4610217&amp;post=155&amp;subd=adamvincentgilmer&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>This post is the first in a series on developing better time management skills.  If you are like most people, you probably waste time on various tasks and for various reasons.  Determining what you waste time on and why you are wasting time will give you a starting point for developing better time management skills.</p>
<h2>What Do You Waste Time On?</h2>
<p>Here are a few questions you can ask yourself to help you get a clearer picture of your current time wasting activities &amp; what you can do about them:</p>
<ul>
<li>What activities do you already know of that you waste time on?</li>
<li>Are there related activities that are also time wasters for you?</li>
<li>Dwelling on the past or future can be a huge time waster and drain your energy.  How much time do you spend living in the past or future?</li>
</ul>
<h2>Do You Give Away Your Time?</h2>
<ul>
<li>Do you ever feel frustrated because you’ve “given away” your time?</li>
<li>In what situations does this happen?</li>
<li>Can you eliminate or reduce these types of situations?</li>
</ul>
<p>Once you&#8217;ve identified your specific time wasters you can begin to address &#8220;why&#8221; you waste time and ways to eliminate, delegate and rearrange necessary activities so you can manage your time more effectively.</p>
<p>Stay tuned for my next blog post in this series on Developing Better Time Management Skills.</p>
<p>Cheers!</p>
<p><a href="http://www.adamvincentgilmer.com/" target="_blank">Adam Vincent Gilmer</a><br />
Follow Me on Twitter <a href="http://twitter.com/#%21/8020365" target="_blank">Here</a><br />
Join My &#8220;8020365&#8243; Facebook Page <a href="http://www.facebook.com/pages/8020365/137678282942052" target="_blank">Here<br />
</a></p>
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			<media:title type="html">Adam Vincent</media:title>
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		<title>Join the 8020365 Face Book Page. Search for 8020365</title>
		<link>http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2010/10/08/join-the-8020365-face-book-page-httpon-fb-medigqb6/</link>
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		<pubDate>Fri, 08 Oct 2010 00:12:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Adam Vincent Gilmer</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[8020365]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Bill Clinton]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Kobe Bryant]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/?p=132</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By the numbers it means that 80 percent of your outcomes come from 20 percent of your inputs. As Pareto demonstrated with his research this “rule” holds true, in a very rough sense, to an 80/20 ratio, however in many cases the ratio can be a lot higher - 99/1 may be closer to reality. <a href="http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2010/10/08/join-the-8020365-face-book-page-httpon-fb-medigqb6/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a><img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com&amp;blog=4610217&amp;post=132&amp;subd=adamvincentgilmer&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/redirect?tag=magicaustralia&amp;creative=9325&amp;camp=1789&amp;link_code=ur2&amp;path=tg/detail/-/1857883314/"></a>I can’t remember exactly when I was first exposed to the 80/20 Rule but I know when it first really hit home. I was reading a book by Robert G. Allen “Nothing Down” a popular real estate best seller and while the 8020 Rule was mentioned there, it made me think and then in became all consuming. In everyday life 80% of the work and results are truly accomplished by only 20% items and input. I went down to Borders my local bookshop near Starbucks and I picked up a copy of <em>Living The 80/20 Way</em> by Richard Koch. Koch took the 80/20 Rule and made it his own by writing a series of books on the topic. <em>Living The 80/20 Way</em> fit me well because it discussed living life productively seeking maximum satisfaction by focusing on your passions (Koch has written other books focusing on the 80/20 Rule for business and managers that I didn’t enjoy quite as much). At the time I sometimes accused myself of being lazy for not “working hard” but I realized what I was doing was living an 80/20 lifestyle and in fact probably being a lot more productive than those working harder than myself. What if you could work on 20% items 80% of the time, where would this lead? What would the outcome be?</p>
<h3>What Exactly Is The 80/20 Rule?</h3>
<p>By the numbers it means that 80 percent of your outcomes come from 20 percent of your inputs. As Pareto demonstrated with his research this “rule” holds true, in a very rough sense, to an 80/20 ratio, however in many cases the ratio can be a lot higher &#8211; 99/1 may be closer to reality.</p>
<p>It really doesn’t matter what numbers you apply, the important thing to understand is that in your life there are certain activities you do (your 20 percent) that account for the majority (your 80 percent) of your happiness and outputs.</p>
<p>You may have expected me to say that 20 percent of your activities produce 80 percent of your financial rewards, and that is true, there are probably a handful of activities you do each week that produce your income. You can definitely apply the 80/20 Rule to most aspects of your business or working life, however I believe your overall happiness and satisfaction are much better variables to focus on. Money certainly plays an important role in your happiness and your money is influenced by 80/20 relationships, but it is only a component that leads to your overall well being, which should be your primary concern.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>Join the 80 20 365 Face Book page, where there is a daily update to remind you to practice 80 20 365 Thinking on a daily basis. Just look up 8020365 we are easy to find. </p>
<p>80 20 365 work shops will begin again in December and first quarter or 2011 (Jan, Feb and March) notification will be sent via Face Book. Search 8020365 after login. </p>
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			<media:title type="html">Adam Vincent</media:title>
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		<title>The 80/20 Rule on Youtube. #8020365</title>
		<link>http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2010/03/13/128/</link>
		<comments>http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2010/03/13/128/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 13 Mar 2010 23:48:20 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Adam Vincent Gilmer</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[8020 Rule]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2010/03/13/128/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The 80 20 365 Rule Practiced Daily. Find out how you can this principle work for you.   <a href="http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2010/03/13/128/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a><img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com&amp;blog=4610217&amp;post=128&amp;subd=adamvincentgilmer&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><br />
</strong> <span style="text-align:center; display: block;"><a href="http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2010/03/13/128/"><img src="http://img.youtube.com/vi/deH1iKYCYz8/2.jpg" alt="" /></a></span><br />
Find out more about the 8020365 Principle and how you can use this to get more out of your life.</p>
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			<media:title type="html">Adam Vincent</media:title>
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		<title>Faith, Belief and Trust. All parts of your Confidence.</title>
		<link>http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2010/02/07/faith-belief-and-trust-all-parts-of-your-confidence/</link>
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		<pubDate>Sun, 07 Feb 2010 21:51:22 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Adam Vincent Gilmer</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[Trustworthiness is the ability to trust, and trust propensity being able to rely on them in relationships and risk taking. Once trust is lost, by obvious violation of one of these three determinants, it is very hard to regain. Thus there is clear asymmetry in the building versus destruction of trust.  <a href="http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2010/02/07/faith-belief-and-trust-all-parts-of-your-confidence/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a><img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com&amp;blog=4610217&amp;post=118&amp;subd=adamvincentgilmer&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Faith is the confident belief or trust in the truth or trustworthiness of a person, idea, or thing. The word &#8220;faith&#8221; can refer to a religious belief itself or to religion in general. As with &#8220;trust,&#8221; faith and belief involves a concept of future events or outcomes manifested over time, and is used conversely for a belief &#8221;not resting on logical proof or material evidence.&#8221;</p>
<p>Informal usage of the word &#8220;faith&#8221; can be quite broad, and may be used in place of &#8220;trust&#8221; or &#8220;belief.&#8221; Faith is often used in a religious context, as in theology, where it almost universally refers to a trusting belief in a transcendent reality, or else in a Supreme Being and/or this being&#8217;s role in the order of transcendent, spiritual things.</p>
<p>Faith, belief and trust is in general the persuasion of the mind that a certain statement is true and or factual. It is the belief and the assent of the mind to the truth of what is declared by another, based on his or her authority and truthfulness. The English word faith is dated from 1200–50, from the Latin fidem, or fidēs, meaning trust, akin to fīdere, which means to trust (making your words count!)</p>
<p>From this perspective, trust, faith and belief is a mental state, which cannot be measured directly but can be seen when follow-up and follow-through takes place. This means that this is  all happening in your mind. Confidence in the results of trusting or having faith may be measured through behavior, or alternatively, one can measure self-reported trust, faith or belief (with all the caveat surrounding that method). Trust, faith and belief may be considered a moral choice, as in the legend of Damon and Pythias, or at least a heuristic, allowing the human to deal with complexities that outgo rationalistic reasoning. In this case, machine-human trust is meaningless, because computers have no moral sense and rely on rational computations.</p>
<p>A second perspective in social theory comes from the classic Foundations of Social Theory by James S. Coleman. Coleman offers a four-part definition:</p>
<ol>
<li><em>Placement of trust allows actions that otherwise are not possible (i.e. trust allows actions to be conducted based on incomplete information on the case in hand).</em></li>
<li><em>The person in whom trust is placed (trustee) is trustworthy, then the trustor will be better off than if he or she had not trusted. Conversely, if the trustee is not trustworthy, then the trustor will be worse off than if he or she had not trusted (this is reminiscent of the classical prisoner&#8217;s dilemma).</em></li>
<li><em>Trust is an action that involves a voluntary transfer of resources (physical, financial, intellectual, or temporal) from the truster to the trustee with no real commitment from the trustee (again prisoner&#8217;s dilemma).</em></li>
<li><em>A time lag exists between the extension of trust and the result of the trusting behavior.</em></li>
</ol>
<p>The strength of Coleman&#8217;s definition is that it allows for discussion of trust behavior. These discussions have been particularly useful in reasoning about human-computer trust, and trust behaviors.</p>
<p>A critical element in studies of trust behavior is power. One who is in a position of dependence cannot be said to trust another in a moral sense, but can be defined as trusting another in the most strict behavioral sense. Trusting another party when one is compelled to do so is sometimes called reliance, to indicate that the belief in benevolence and competence may be absent, while the behaviors are present. Others refer only to coercion.</p>
<p>Coleman&#8217;s definition does not account for the distinction between trust(worthiness) as a moral attribute and trustworthiness as mere reliability. It is Annette Baier (Trust and Antitrust, in Ethics, 1986) who characterizes contexts of trust as structures of interaction in which moral obligations act upon the trustees.</p>
<p>The substantive conflict in the social sciences is whether trust is entirely internal, and only confidence is observable, or whether trust behaviors (and self reported levels of trust) can meaningfully measure trust in the absence of coercion. Note however that many languages (e.g. Dutch or German) do not distinguish between the words trust and confidence, which is complicating this issue. The distinction between trust and confidence is an unsolved issue in current trust/confidence research.</p>
<p>In general, trust is essential as Social institutions, such as governments, economies, and communities require trust to function. Therefore trust and altruism are areas of study for both economists and management scientists although these concepts go beyond strict rational economics.</p>
<p><strong>Psychology</strong></p>
<p>In psychology trust is believing the person who you trust to do what you expect. It starts at the family and grows to others. According to the psychoanalyst Erik Erikson development of basic trust is the first state psychosocial development occurring, or failing, during the first two years of life.</p>
<p>Success results in feelings of security, trust, and optimism, while failure leads towards an orientation of insecurity and mistrust. Trust is integral to the idea of social influence: it is easier to influence or persuade someone who is trusting.</p>
<p>The notion of trust is increasingly adopted to predict acceptance of behaviors by others, institutions (e.g. government agencies) and objects such as machines. However, once again perception of honesty, competence and value similarity (slightly similar to benevolence) are essential. There are three different forms of trust.</p>
<p>Trust is being vulnerable to someone even when they are trustworthy; Trustworthiness is the ability to trust, and trust propensity being able to rely on them in relationships and risk taking. Once trust is lost, by obvious violation of one of these three determinants, it is very hard to regain. Thus there is clear asymmetry in the building versus destruction of trust. Hence being and acting trustworthy should be considered the only sure way to maintain a trust level. There is much research has been done on the notion of trust and its social implications:</p>
<ul>
<li>Barbara Misztal in her book attempts to combine all notions of trust together. She points out three basic things that trust does in the lives of people: It makes social life predictable, it creates a sense of community, and it makes it easier for people to work together.</li>
<li>In the context of sexual trust Riki Robbins describes four stages of trust which we will cover later on in this article.</li>
<li>In the context of Information theory Ed Gerck defines and contrasts trust with social functions such as power, surveillance, and accountability:</li>
</ul>
<p>In addition to the social influence, in organizational settings, trust may have a positive influence on the behaviors, perceptions, and performances of a person. One factor that enhances trust in a human being is facial resemblance. Evidence shows through manipulation of facial resemblance in a two person sequential trust game that having similar facial features (facial resemblance) enhanced trust in their partner. Structure often creates trust in a person that encourages them to feel comfortable and excel in the workplace. Working anywhere may be stressful and takes effort. By having a conveniently organized area to work on, concentration will increase as well as effort. Structure is not just a method of order. It increases trust and therefore makes a workplace manageable. A structured, ordered environment produces trust as one may contain increased cooperation and perform on a higher level. <em>(On a personal note, this is why my sales and marketing organizations grow each week.)</em></p>
<p>People may work together and achieve success through trust while working on projects that rely on each individual’s contribution. Conversely, where trust is absent, projects can fail, especially if this lack of trust has not been identified and addressed.</p>
<p>This is one facet of analysis: This thinking framework is used when studying information systems. Identifying and dealing with cases where information providers, information users, and those responsible for processing information do not trust one another can result in the removal of a risk factor for a project. One&#8217;s social relationship characterized by low trust and norms that discourage academic engagement are expected to be associated with low academic achievement. Individuals that are in relationships characterized by high levels of social trust are more apt to openly exchange information and to act with caring benevolence toward one another than those in relationships lacking trust.</p>
<p>An important key to treating sexual victimization of a child is the rebuilding of trust between parent and child. Failure for the adults to validate the sexual abuse contributes to the child&#8217;s difficulty towards trusting the self and others. Trust, belief and faith is often affected by the erosion of a marriage. Children of divorce do not exhibit less trust in mothers, partners, spouses, friends, and associates than their peers of intact families. The impact of parental divorce is limited to trust in the &#8220;father&#8221; figure. In all kinds of relationships leadership is required and needed. Leadership skills are developed over time and thus promote trust, faith and belief.</p>
<p><strong>Philosophy</strong></p>
<p>Some philosophers argue that trust is more than a relationship of reliance. Philosophers such as Annette Baier have made a difference between trust and reliance by saying that trust can be betrayed, whilst reliance can only be disappointed (Baier 1986, 235). Carolyn McLeod explains Baier&#8217;s argument by giving the following examples: we can rely on our clock to give the time, but we do not feel betrayed when it breaks, thus, we cannot say that we trusted it; we are not trusting when we are suspicious of the other person, because this is in fact an expression of distrust (McLeod 2006). Thus, trust is different from reliance in the sense that the truster must accept the risk of being betrayed.</p>
<p><strong>The Four Stages of Trust</strong></p>
<p>by Dr. Riki Robbins, Ph.D.</p>
<p>Trust evolves. We start off as babies with perfect trust. Inevitably, trust is damaged by our parents or other family members. Depending on the severity, we may experience devastated trust, in which the trust is completely broken. In order to heal, we must learn when and how trust can be restored. As part of this final step, if we cannot fully trust someone. then we establish guarded, conditional, or selective trust.</p>
<p><strong>Perfect Trust</strong></p>
<p>The first people besides ourselves that we learn to trust — or mistrust — are our parents. If they behave with integrity, tell us the truth, and keep their promises, then we are inclined to believe that other people will do the same thing. If our parents tell us to trust them, and then break their word, we may never learn to trust at all.</p>
<p>When Cathy, a college professor, was betrayed, she experienced total mistrust at first. She asked me, &#8220;Can I trust anyone: myself, other people, or even God?&#8221; I asked her if she remembered feeling this way before. She thought for a moment and then replied, &#8220;Yes. When I was a little girl. My father was a minister devoted to spreading the word of God. Yet he beat me and my brother regularly. It seemed so crazy to me. How could someone who was supposed to be so good act so bad? If I couldn&#8217;t trust him to back up his words with actions, then I couldn&#8217;t trust anyone else.&#8221; Since I fully empathized with how Cathy was feeling, it was difficult to disagree with her. But I did tell her that unless she changed her attitude she wouldn&#8217;t have healthy love relationships in the future.</p>
<p>None of us become adults and retain the perfect trust we were born with. But that doesn&#8217;t mean we have to go to the opposite extreme. As my good friend author and public speaker Cheewa James puts it, &#8220;I trust everybody at the beginning. I assume everyone is loving until proven otherwise.&#8221; For best results, start off a relationship with the assumption that the other person is trustworthy. Be careful to protect yourself, but give him (or her) the benefit of the doubt.</p>
<p><strong>Damaged Trust, Belief and Faith.</strong></p>
<p>Inevitably, the person you love will violate your trust. The most common warning signs include: Withholding vital information. You say, &#8220;Where were you last night until 2:00 A.M.?&#8221; &#8220;Nowhere special.&#8221; Lying. He says, &#8220;I was working late,&#8221; but when you called his office, there was no answer. Giving you mixed messages. He denies your accusations but doesn&#8217;t look you in the eye. Refusing to negotiate. When you ask, &#8220;Will you promise to stay away from her?&#8221; he says, &#8220;Leave me alone,&#8221; and walks away.</p>
<p>Deep in your heart you know that trust has been damaged. When you find out about a betrayal immediately after it happens, trust is broken. But it is not necessarily devastating. Especially if it is a mini-betrayal, you and your partner can talk about the incident, agree that it won&#8217;t occur again, and reestablish a bond of openness and loyalty.</p>
<p><strong>Devastated Trust</strong></p>
<p>When your partner violates your limits and behaves in a way you find morally unacceptable, your trust is completely broken. Typically this happens after a betrayal when you&#8217;ve been cheated on, lied to, and treated with profound disrespect.</p>
<p>Devastated trust is a crisis. The first time it happens you may totally regress. You feel as if you&#8217;re five years old as you re-experience your original fundamental loss. You ask yourself, just as Cathy did, &#8220;Whom can I trust?&#8221; You may answer your own question, &#8220;Not my mother or my father, not even my partner. Who&#8217;s left?&#8221; Before you can think about trusting yourself and other people, you have to deal with the situation at hand. Can trust possibly be restored? If not, you will have to end the relationship despite any remaining good qualities.</p>
<p>What happens if you suddenly find out that you&#8217;ve been betrayed long ago? This happened to Edith, a newspaper editor. After her husband, Joe, returned from a weekend personal growth seminar, he decided to &#8220;come clean&#8221; about his previous sexual infidelities. Late one night, he told Edith that when he had visited an old out-of-town girlfriend five years ago, the two of them had sex. Furthermore, they had both discussed the possibility of ending their marriages so they could have a serious relationship together. &#8220;I could never trust Joe again after that,&#8221; Edith told me. &#8220;If he had told me at the time we might have been able to salvage something. But to find out five years later? All this time he&#8217;d been withholding vital information. How could I possibly know what else he is hiding now?&#8221;</p>
<p>Francesca, a computer technician, was offered a choice. Her husband, George, told her, &#8220;During the early years of our marriage I committed a few indiscretions. I&#8217;d like to tell you so I can get them off my chest. Is this all right with you?&#8221; Francesca thought for a while before she responded, &#8220;You can tell me if you like. But if you do I&#8217;ll never believe another word you say again. The time to tell me was when it happened, not now.&#8221; Of course, simply by bringing up the subject, he shattered her trust completely.</p>
<p>If you suspect that your partner betrayed you, you should confront him as soon as you can. You may rationalize, &#8220;I don&#8217;t want to hurt him, get into an argument, or rock the boat.&#8221;</p>
<p><em>Short-term pain is long-term gain</em>. Every moment you wait, trust is eroded. Conversely, if you betray your partner, either reveal it at the time or else take a vow of eternal silence. Sharing a betrayal farther down the road devastates trust.</p>
<p>If trust is repeatedly broken can it be restored? No. Harriet, a registered nurse, had a tumultuous courtship. Her fiancé, Ira, left her to go back to a former girlfriend. When they broke up, he returned to her, promised her an engagement ring, and asked her to marry him. Two weeks later, he spent the weekend with another former girlfriend. Upon his return, he announced that he wanted to postpone their engagement because he wanted to continue dating. Harriet waited patiently until he gave up his second girlfriend. Six months later, she married him. It was a mistake. Harriet said to me, &#8220;I actually believed that Ira and I could &#8216;start over&#8217;. But it wasn&#8217;t true. I had lost all respect for him. My trust had been violated so often that I found myself waiting for it to happen again. And Ira continued his habit of having other sexual relationships behind my back. For our relationship to survive it was up to him to take the lead in restoring trust. And he didn&#8217;t.&#8221;</p>
<p><strong>Restored Trust</strong></p>
<p>Can you restore sexual or romantic trust once it is damaged or destroyed? It&#8217;s possible, but difficult. You don&#8217;t get past a betrayal overnight; it takes months or even years.</p>
<p>The good news is that the aftermath of a betrayal is an opportunity to strengthen your relationship. If you and your partner openly talk about what happened, you will open the gateway to deeper intimacy. While you cannot be positive that you won&#8217;t be betrayed again you can certainly minimize the chances.</p>
<p>Discuss your partner&#8217;s motives for betraying you and your own involvement in the cause. Honestly share how you feel, and what you need at the present moment. Express your concerns about the future, let each other know what you expect from now on, and state your limits about what you will and won&#8217;t put up with. If you can&#8217;t have this kind of conversation by yourselves, then get professional help right away. Don&#8217;t wait; mistrust can become a habit. A qualified therapist, psychologist, or marriage counselor can guide the two of you as you explore why the betrayal happened and how to prevent another one.</p>
<p>Gradually you&#8217;ll start trusting each other in small matters — and then in bigger ones.</p>
<p>One thing&#8217;s for sure: You can&#8217;t turn back the clock. You and your partner don&#8217;t feel the same way toward each other anymore. Trust has been broken and it&#8217;s difficult to fix. As you put your relationship back together, both of you see each other differently.</p>
<p>You think, &#8220;Maybe I can trust this person again but from now on I need to be careful.&#8221; Your trust is not as complete as it once was. It may be:</p>
<p>Guarded trust. You think, &#8220;I&#8217;ll trust you again, but I&#8217;ll be on guard for another betrayal. If it happened once it could happen again.&#8221;</p>
<p>Conditional trust. You think, &#8220;I&#8217;ll trust you again under certain conditions, such as if you never communicate with the accomplice again.&#8221;</p>
<p>Selective trust. You think, &#8220;I&#8217;ll trust you with money but not with sex. You can continue to write checks on our joint account as you have in the past. But I want detailed information and frequent reassurance that you&#8217;re being faithful to me.&#8221;</p>
<p>By making one of these agreements, you take a big first step in the right direction.</p>
<p>But suppose you can&#8217;t restore trust? What if you feel that you can&#8217;t trust anyone ever again? Janice, a writer-editor whose trust had been recently devastated, answers: &#8220;Since my husband cheated on me I realize that I can be betrayed at any time. In one split second my life can turn upside down. But I don&#8217;t choose to focus on the uncertainty. If I did, life would be too difficult. I couldn&#8217;t have a love relationship with anyone. So while I&#8217;m aware of the danger of trusting other people, I don&#8217;t obsess. I continue to reach out even though part of me shouts, &#8216;Watch out&#8217;.&#8221;</p>
<p>Next Week we will cover, &#8220;How to Create Trust&#8221;.</p>
<p>Thanks  again for your time and comments <img src='http://s0.wp.com/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':)' class='wp-smiley' /> </p>
<p>Adam Vincent Gilmer</p>
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		<title>Former President Bill Clinton Endorses Network Marketing &amp; Direct Selling</title>
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		<pubDate>Sun, 31 Jan 2010 16:02:29 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Adam Vincent Gilmer</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[It is important that the Direct Sales industry be represented correctly and with credibility. Take a listen and turn up the volume and then share this link with colleagues and friends. 8020365 Thinking. <a href="http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2010/01/31/115/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a><img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com&amp;blog=4610217&amp;post=115&amp;subd=adamvincentgilmer&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong>President Clinton Endorses Network Marketing &amp; Direct Selling</strong><br />
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It is important that the Direct Sales industry be represented correctly and with credibility. Take a listen and turn up the volume and then share this link with colleagues and friends. 8020365 Thinking.</p>
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		<title>&#8220;Bottom Lines&#8221;  Success Principle # 4</title>
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		<pubDate>Sat, 30 Jan 2010 18:25:39 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Adam Vincent Gilmer</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[Once you begin to understand how this works, you will recognize that creating a mastermind team of people, or aligning with the right people who qualify for your time and with whom you can TRUST will make all the difference in the world.  This is important to you having breakthroughs and boosting productivity with all that your do. <a href="http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2010/01/30/bottom-lines-success-principle-4/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a><img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com&amp;blog=4610217&amp;post=108&amp;subd=adamvincentgilmer&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong>Your Bottom Lines</strong></p>
<p>You have heard  this term in accounting term referred to in many conservations. This is the result of the days tasks and activities and in our case the 8020365 System each day counts towards the next. When one day is stacked one a top each other over 30 days and eventuality over years these Bottom Lines count for you accomplishing your life objectives.  This is your management of your time  and  ultimately your life, it&#8217;s a  responsibility for your own areas as benefit decisions, job assignments, tasks and your overall objectives. The term is also a way for you to measure the management of your day , the ultimate results.  It is often used as an expression when seeking the result without asking for the reasons, as in ‘What is the bottom line?&#8217;</p>
<p><strong>1. Being  2. Brain 3. Body 4. Time 5. People  6. Money </strong></p>
<div>
<p>When you look at your wheel of life which is made up of these six main spokes. Each of these spokes are the major supports in your life and are the make up of who and what you are.  If you learn to work on each of these  areas of your life you will produce results.  The objective here is to produce and work on these areas with  specialized mental focus and an understanding of the 8020365 Principles.  When followed in order 1 through 6 produces major results in all areas of your life.  Once you begin to understand how this works, you will recognize that creating a mastermind team of people, or aligning with the right people who qualify for your time and with whom you can TRUST will make all the difference in the world.  This is important to you having breakthroughs and boosting productivity with all that your do.</p>
</div>
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			<media:title type="html">Adam Vincent</media:title>
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		<title>How You Can Live An 8020365 Lifestyle.</title>
		<link>http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2010/01/09/how-you-can-live-an-8020365-lifestyle/</link>
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		<pubDate>Sat, 09 Jan 2010 17:21:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Adam Vincent Gilmer</dc:creator>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/?p=105</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The message is simple enough - focus on activities that produce the best outcomes for you. This applies to both your business/working life and your “other” life (I think they are all part of your “life” but people often prefer to distinguish them). The problem for most people is how to make a living from what you really enjoy, so lets focus on that… <a href="http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2010/01/09/how-you-can-live-an-8020365-lifestyle/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a><img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com&amp;blog=4610217&amp;post=105&amp;subd=adamvincentgilmer&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<h3>How You Can Live An 8020365 Lifestyle</h3>
<p>When you start to analyze and breakdown your life into elements it’s very easy to see 80/20 ratios all over the place, even the bible and breakfast. The trick, once your key happiness determinants have been identified, is to make everything work in harmony and avoid wasting time on those 80 percent activities that produce little satisfaction for you.</p>
<p>The message is simple enough &#8211; focus on activities that produce the best outcomes for you. This applies to both your business/working life and your “other” life (I think they are all part of your “life” but people often prefer to distinguish them). The problem for most people is how to make a living from what you really enjoy, so lets focus on that…</p>
<p>I’m sure you have heard the phrase “struggling artist”. The stereotype where a creative person, musicians, actors, writers and artists, struggle to get discovered and work long hours on horrible day jobs, often in retail and hospitality, until hopefully they finally break out, get discovered and become famous. It shouldn’t surprise you that the ratio of struggling artists who actually become famous enough to live off their craft also follows an 8020365 Rules &#8211; only a small few of the overall total manage to get that far.</p>
<p>The same can be said for entrepreneurs. How many of you now reading this article are working day jobs, jobs you probably don’t like much, while you work hard after-hours to get your dream business up and running?</p>
<p>In truth, and this is a sad fact, most people in the world work jobs they don’t like and only truly live their passions on weekends and outside of working hours. Only a small sample actually live their passions day in and day out, how they want to and when they want to. If you want to become one of the special few so you can live your passions on your terms there are a few things you can do.</p>
<h3>Focus On Your Passions, Not Material Possessions</h3>
<p>The simple fact is not everyone can be a famous artist. Not everyone will start a million dollar business. I’m not going to tell you stop striving for those goals, I’m working on them myself, however you can work smarter TODAY to find greater fulfillment, and that is what living an 8020365 lifestyle is all about. Best of all, your likelihood of becoming one of the famous artists or entrepreneurs is enhanced if you tweak your life to follow the 8020365 Rules because you tap into what you do best more often.</p>
<p>The first thing you must decide, and this is often the hardest step, is to determine what it is exactly you have passion for. Some people can answer this question easily &#8211; <em>“I want to be a famous pianists/singer/poet/author”</em>, <em>“I’d like to run my own real estate agency/coffee shop/advertising company”</em> etc. Others may have a general idea <em>“I don’t want a day job”</em> or <em>“I want to run a business”</em> but the specifics are not sorted yet. If you are not sure what your passions are all I can suggest is test yourself. It’s usually easy to determine what you DON’T like so keep doing that until you find what it is you DO like.</p>
<p>Learn to have and be on &#8220;Purpose&#8221; every day, this is 8020365 thinking! (More on Twitter, Face-Book and LinkedIn search: <strong><em>8020365 Groups</em></strong>.)</p>
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			<media:title type="html">Adam Vincent</media:title>
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		<title>Success Principle # 3</title>
		<link>http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2010/01/02/success-principle-3/</link>
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		<pubDate>Sat, 02 Jan 2010 17:46:28 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Adam Vincent Gilmer</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[This time management tool was created to make the principles taught in this 3, 5 and 7  Day Mastermind Workshops work easily and effectively for you. Its purpose is to make each day more productive and effective by increasing the awareness of these three success principles. As you bank each day in your personal vault - your weeks, months and years will take care of themselves. Find out more about the workshops at www.8020365.com ( http://bit.ly/5Wtpco )  and http://bit.ly/5RkUkf  <a href="http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2010/01/02/success-principle-3/">Continue reading <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a><img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com&amp;blog=4610217&amp;post=98&amp;subd=adamvincentgilmer&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong>The Wheel of Life</strong></p>
<p>Explaining how life works for all of us can sometimes be complex. What we all have in common is Time. We all have a Monday we all have week and we all have months and years. We all have to do lists and other priority tasks and activities.  When life tends to get busy and all your energy is  focused on a specific  project,  it&#8217;s all too easy to find yourself &#8220;off balance&#8221;, not paying enough attention to all the important areas of your life. While  its important to have focus,  it is also important not to neglect the other areas of your life, not doing so can yscause dire problems and an imbalanced life. Life coaches use &#8220;The Wheel of Life&#8221;  to demonstrate and identify the areas requiring more attention, likewise the 8020365 System incorporates this principle of Life Balance.</p>
<p>Your life should be designed and engineered to be, &#8220;The Ultimate Life Experience!&#8221; For some it is, and then for some it could be labeled, &#8220;Let me tell you what I have experienced!&#8221; We are so eager to jump in and pursue our goals that we tell ourselves, &#8220;Once I have made my first million, I&#8217;ll have plenty of time for relationships.&#8221; Or perhaps this one, &#8220;As soon as I get my act together on my knowledge side of things I will focus on my physical side of my life.&#8221; There are many other examples of this. This is just like the story of the tortoise and the hare; it can be very frustrating watching the competition speed away from the start. Rather, slow down and work on the other areas of your life and stay in balance. Work on all  areas of your life every day. There is much evidence that supports  the fact that a balanced individual has fewer  serious illnesses of those who are out of balance. A balanced individual makes more money as well! Why? People who are in balance are focused on the 20 percent Vital activities. They are constantly working on their high payoff tasks.</p>
<p><strong>The Six Areas of Your Life</strong></p>
<p><strong>Being</strong></p>
<p>The  ontology of &#8220;Being&#8221; the study, the existence, becoming aware;   properly best described  Karl Heinrich Marx (May 5, 1818–March 14, 1883) was a German philosopher and economist who wrote &#8220;It depends not on consciousness, but on being; not on thought, but on life; it depends on the individual&#8217;s empirical development and manifestation of life, which in turn depends on the conditions existing in the world.&#8221; The life existence of your character, your unique being. I think you know that you are more than just your body, organs arms and legs. There is something more there than just you as Dr. Wayne Dyer describes in his book , &#8220;The Power of Intention.&#8221; The source of Purpose is your Being.</p>
<p><strong>Brain</strong></p>
<p>There are as many as if not more than 100 billion brain cells. Then there is the neuronal and synaptic connections. What a mass of nerves, the center of thought, referred to as the organ of intelligence  and to incredible tool it is and can be. The home of our mental ability and understanding. Your genius if you will.  Scientists and other experts  in the psychological, sociological fields have asserted that humans use maybe .01 to.10 percent of our brain, we are only using a fraction of its potential. What a gift.  What if you could just improve the use your brain you could improve your life dramatically. Expand the use of it with new knowledge, gain keen insight and wisdom. At the end of your life do you want to be told that you could have had anything you wanted if you just used your brain? Stretch it and make it work for you. It&#8217;s yours free and clear.</p>
<p><strong>Body</strong></p>
<p>The physical structure and material substance of what holds you together. What if you could make it last longer say another 15 to 30 years if you looked after it better? How about what you put in to your body, your diet can that improve? Your heart beats over a 42,075,904 beats per year, give or take a few million. Over a lifetime is about three billion times. This happens with out you even thinking about it. WOW! What about your eyes, your ears, taste, and smell? A fabulous slab of beef. Could you treat it with more care and make it more productive? Would this mean more energy, time and  money in your pocket. The benefits of a healthy life with diet and exercise is documented over and over again.</p>
<p><strong>Time</strong></p>
<p>A non-spatial continuum in which events occur in apparently irreversible succession from the past through the present to the future. And within this our lives, a duration, an interval separating two points on this continuum as a number of years, days, or minutes, representing us as interval in this space.  Since the solar year consists of 525,948 minutes and 48 seconds and they go by every day. Can you imagine anyone knowing this and just letting it all slip away? Millions and millions of people do every day. How organized and  are you? Could you begin t use the 8020365 system to become a better manager of your life/time.  As your Purpose becomes real and practiced, you will become more organized and . A cluttered room means a cluttered mind. What if you could squeeze from your day 20 percent more tasks? What would this mean? What if you learned to delegate better? Can you plan how you would invest your time from here on?</p>
<p><strong>People</strong></p>
<p>Relationships. Social, Client based, Strategic connections.  Who are you associating with on purpose? Could you be limiting some of your Trivial many associations? Who are the people that will move you faster towards your objectives,  who are your 20 percent vital few? Who are the people who can get things done? What could you do in the next hour that could improve some special relationships? People make up our world and like you are a product of their surroundings. Witch like-minded beings or business partners with a similar mindset and interests can you identify and attract?  is who we want. Do you have a master mind team? Who are the people who make up your mastermind team? Who are the people who count in your life? Can you spend more time around benevolent people, improve your communications, your associations and your existing relationships?</p>
<p><strong>Money</strong></p>
<p>Usually connected with ones career. Income, a medium that can be exchanged for goods and services and is used as a measure of their values on the open market, notes and our coins or a commodity such as gold. Who ever has enough anyway? What unique service can you provide in the exchange for more money? What is the marketing plan to earn it? Could you be better at your job?</p>
<p>What investments do you have, what investments can you make? Do you have money working for you? What new business pursuits have been placed in your path? How can you or have you taken advantage of them? How about the Savings vault, can this improve? Could you learn to manage money better? A lifetime of study would still not cover learn the entire puzzle. This is where the 8020365 Pro Account  comes into play. Each of these areas of your life can be kept in balance by using the system.</p>
<p>There is a much bigger picture for you to mentally digest, learn, follow and ultimately take action on. It will take desire, persistence and daily practice until you make it a habit. It must become like second nature to you.</p>
<p>This time management tool was created to make the principles taught in  3, 5 &amp;  7  Day Mastermind Workshops work easily and effectively for you. Its purpose is to make each day more productive and effective by increasing the awareness of these three success principles. As you bank each day in your personal vault &#8211; your weeks, months and years will take care of themselves. Your sixty-day tasks are about to begin, all you do is exercise your inherited free will to follow through on what you are learning. I know that your results will be tremendous.</p>
<p>This is your plan, your blueprint for a new and wonderful life. Over the last several days you have learned, studied and grown in various areas of your life. It&#8217;s been an unforgettable experience for me personally. This time-management tool is simple and will be easy to implement in your life. As you use it, you will begin to notice dramatic improvements in your life after only a few days. This system has been designed and engineered for you to manage your network marketing business. Many of you will get results within your first week of use. Let&#8217;s begin, shall we?</p>
<p><strong>Register for the 2010 three, five and seven day workshops at www.8020365.com</strong></p>
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			<media:title type="html">Adam Vincent</media:title>
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		<title>The Power of &#8220;Purpose&#8221;</title>
		<link>http://adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com/2009/12/26/96/</link>
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		<pubDate>Sat, 26 Dec 2009 12:59:05 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Adam Vincent Gilmer</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[8020365]]></category>
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		<description><![CDATA[8020365 Rule of Time Management Focus on what&#8217;s really important in your life and your life&#8217;s work. Find your Purpose http://bit.ly/5RkUkf<img alt="" border="0" src="http://stats.wordpress.com/b.gif?host=adamvincentgilmer.wordpress.com&amp;blog=4610217&amp;post=96&amp;subd=adamvincentgilmer&amp;ref=&amp;feed=1" width="1" height="1" />]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>8020365 Rule of Time Management<br />
Focus on what&#8217;s really important in your life and your life&#8217;s work. Find your Purpose <a href="http://bit.ly/5RkUkf">http://bit.ly/5RkUkf</a></p>
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			<media:title type="html">Adam Vincent</media:title>
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